What's Your Hoe Type? Part 1

Hello ladies and gentleman, I know I've be slacking on the blogs but get over it. Anyway, I've been reading a lot about "Hoes" lately and decided to touch on the topic. This will probably put my pussy rate on a drastic decline, so y'all better love this shit.

Let's begin...

Everybody talks about hoes, judging hoes, praising hoes, downing hoes everything you can think of. But I noticed no one ever has a justifiable reason on why these "hoes" are hoes. So I decided to explain the different types of hoes and how to identify them.

Ok let's begin, Foreal Foreal this time..

THE RELATIONSHIP HOE

This is the sneakiest type within the hoe species, and possibly the most deadliest of them all. The relationship hoe is infamous for a plethora of relationships. This is how they mask the hoeness and blend in with average females. These hoes are also known to be heartbreakers, due to past relationships and insecurities. The relationship hoe was once a good girl, but made a change for the worst after they felt that agonizing pain of heartbreak. These hoes are the reason a lot of good guys have turned into assholes, which gets them to turn other girls into relationship hoes. It's a never ending cycle. The relationship hoe was once a good girl, so they still have good girl traits. They get into relationships because they don't want to be alone, and the good girl in them won't allow them to just have sex with a random. They will get in a relationship and make a great gf at first, until things start to pick up. That's when the hoe kicks in, that's when they remember the past heartbreak an how they never want to feel that pain again. At this point there is nothin you can do, they will fish for a reason to get out of that relationship. Before they do that they will make sure they have someone else on standby because of their fear of being alone. The relationship hoe has 3 fears, being alone, getting their heart broke, and ironically, being considered a hoe. It's no way to save a relationship hoe, this is something only they can fix when they're ready to. Avoid these hoes at all cost, ask questions so you can properly identify. Ask when was their last relationship. A relationship hoe usually can't go over a month with out having someone new. Be careful out here, this type of hoe is extremely dangerous and will change your life.

That's all for now, hope I helped a few of y'all out. This is just part 1, there are other hoes I will be identifying at a later date. Take care

Act Your Weight

Hello ladies and gentleman, I didn't want to do this but it has to be done. Before I start I would like it to be known I have no problems with fat people! Shit, I'm two quarter pounders and a large fry from being fat myself. But I know I'm no damn sex symbol so I don't act as such. Which gets me to my point, act your weight.

Ok your fat, cool. It's not a big deal, it's millions of Americans that go back for 2nd and 3rd plates at a public function. You're not alone, embrace it and accept it if you're not willing to change it. But please be aware that there are things you should not do at your weight. This is the part where I get frustrated with you fatty mc fat fat's.

With that said, fuck rick Ross. He is a bad influence to fat men across the world. Idc how many women tell you they love your big ass stomach, keep that shirt on in public. Nobody wants to see a big fat man shirtless in public, looking like he's carrying twins. Lil kids confused trying to figure out why your titties bigger than their moms, thinking they're going to grow up that way. Now the Lil boys just throwing fits crying their Lil eyes out bc they don't want titties. Don't scare the kids, keep a shirt on fam. It's people trying to eat and you walking around shirtless with your back looking like a spades table. You don't have a six pack throw on ya shirt that says 'big daddy' across the chest an act your weight.

Ladies don't laugh, y'all are way worse.

Y'all fat girls just think y'all can wear anything y'all want, I'm here to tell y'all that y'all can't. As a man I love seeing women in tights with the butt looking all nice and plump, brings me great joy at the sight. Then you fat girls got hold of em and ruined the art form. I salute y'all tho bc I had no idea any clothing material can stretch like that. It doesn't take away from how disgusting it is to see it. Y'all just pack all that cellulite in them black tights an think y'all hot shit, walking around looking like a trash bag full of cottage cheese. This has got to stop. Then y'all have the nerve to throw on a halter top to just ruin my day even more. It's no reason you should be wearing that with your big ass back out, it shouldn't look like I can cut steak em's off your back. It's dudes walking around now who still can't eat cold cuts because the picture of your back haunts them every time they see it. Just stop this shit, lane Bryant didn't die on that cross for y'all to be dressing like that. Act your weight, cop the jeans with the elastic band an keep it real with yourself.

Just relax fat people, you can still look presentable purchasing items in the big and tall section. If you want to wear the same clothes the skinny people wear, put that snicker bar down and get a gym membership. Oh and before I forget, skinny jeans have the word skinny in them for a reason.

Ok that's all, if I offended you then maybe you should go run and think twice before you woof down that chicken breast. Take care

Keep it or nah?

Hello ladies and gentleman, I feel like I'm going to get judged for this blog post but someone has to do it. Abortion is a touchy subject, but its something that needs to be addressed.

Now let's begin..

Abortion is a necessary evil, some wouldn't agree which baffles me. Not everyone is built to be a parent, some will admit it but some can't. I just feel like you shouldn't want to bring a child in this world if you're not ready. That's what abortions are for, you have options no need to fuck up another life. You don't believe in abortion's you say? Well I don't believe in making selfish decisions. I also don't believe in choosing to be a single parent and struggling everyday. Miss me with that fake deep righteous bullshit, who do y'all think y'all are? Y'all see those people on tv telling you that abortion is wrong and just run with it. But you never stopped to think, those people on those commercials can afford a baby with no problems at all. Now they got shorty that work burger king drive thru thinking abortion is wrong. She barely can keep her cell phone on every month but she think she can afford a baby. She live with her crack head mom but she suddenly don't believe in abortions. That's the shit I be talking about. You have options, don't be ignorant and not use them to your advantage.

But i figured it out..

A lot of women are lonely and miserable and being pregnant is the high light of their life. They know they're not in the position to take care of a child, but they know they will probably never get pregnant again. Of course they won't admit it, that's when they pull out the "I don't believe in abortions" excuse. Cool, you don't believe in abortions and that's fine. Now if you know you don't believe in abortions maybe your dumb ass should believe in condoms. Plan b, birth control, swallowing or something. All the steps to prevent pregnancy should be taken when you don't believe in abortions. A real nigga gon crush that plan b up in ya breakfast tho. Thats not pulp in that orange juice baby. So you don't have to worry about getting pregnant, we handle that off rip. i'ma save that for another blog

But like I was saying...

I'm not telling everyone to get an abortion, I'm just saying make the right decision for what's best for y'all. It takes two to make a baby, therefore it should take two to make the decision on what to do next. Women feel like because it's their body they should make the final decision, and I understand that. But it was also your body when he decided not to pull out. You couldn't control that huh? Oh ok. Now when he tells you he doesn't want the baby, don't call him a dead beat. Not saying I agree at all, but if a man doesn't want the kid you can't make him. Once you make that decision to have the child after he tells you to get the abortion, you have to live with that. Don't complain about him not being there or not paying child support, you knew this was going to happen.

And before I go I also want to say this, don't have too many abortions. I think one is enough, after that you're just a horrible person. Don't turn the juice box into a pine box full off Lil embryo's. Your box is a ghost town after 2 abortions, you can hear the cry's of aborted babies when you buss it open. You should not know off the top of your head how much an abortion is after tax.

But fuck it, do what you want. I'm good tho, no pregnancy scares over here cus my pullout game is impeccable. Take care

Sex Complications

Hello ladies and gentleman, this is a blog. See how I just pointed out the obvious? The crazy part about this and reason why I'm writing this is, some people can't see the obvious.

But let me cook..

Now, I'm sure we have all heard this saying from a fake deep person and that's "sex complicates things". Every time I hear the saying I just want to power drive the person saying it onto a steel chair. To me it's equivalent to saying twitter ruins relationships, which is another idiotic statement. I could be wrong but that sounds like a form of Anthropomorphism. Giving inanimate objects the qualities of a living being. Of course sex is not an object but work with me here. I couldn't find the word I was looking for, but that will suffice. Anyway, how can something like sex complicate things? And what does it complicate exactly? Complicates how you interact with the other person involved maybe? You can't blame that on sex at all, the two involved are the only ones that can complicate anything. Sex should make the relationship better if approached correctly. If you're not in touch with the other persons mental then yes, it may be complications afterwards. Sex didn't complicate it tho, y'all complicated it. Always know what you're getting into before you get into it, that avoids complications. Well you can't avoid the inevitable, but if you know what you're up against you can handle it. But thats only for certain situations.

If its just sex then nothing can be complicated...

Sex can't complicate nothing, nothing can complicate nothing. Feel me? Let me explain, walk with me. If its nothing there, it's no way sex can complicate it. For example, say someone tells you they want to have sex with you. And your response is no and you explain that you said no because sex complicates things. It's nothing sex can complicate in this situation, but on the other hand it's plenty you can complicate. You actually already complicated things by making that statement. Maybe you just don't want to have sex with that person, why not just say that? Maybe you think all that person wants is sex, why not ask and find out? I'm sure you're saying because people lie, which is true. Yes people lie, but you should never assume. It's the not the sex, it's you assuming and lack of communication that complicate things.

Communication is Everything when dealing with someone. The lack of communication is almost certain to lead to a misunderstanding. Communicate, once you feel like y'all understand each other do what you feel. If you get lied to cool, get over it shit happens. It wasn't the sex, you were just dealing with a liar. It's going to happen sometimes, we have all been thru it. You just can't let shit like that alter how you feel about something great as sex.

In conclusion, sex doesn't complicate anything people do. Don't be complicated, find understanding before you make drastic decisions. Don't use that dumb ass phrase, say what you mean and mean what you say. But that's all I have on that. Maybe it didn't make sense, it makes perfect sense to me tho. But hey that's just the Virgo in me, take care.

Joe Budden Pool Party

Hello ladies and gentleman, as you all know my life was changed a few days ago. Through all my hard work and dedication, I actually made it to jersey for Joe Budden pool party. This may be the best thing and the worse thing that has ever happened to me. I'll explain later, let me tell you about this party tho.

How was the party you ask?

Dude, you ever been to heaven? Yea it was like that, I was certain hologram Jesus was gonna show up and perform Jesus walks on the balcony. I seen chicks that looked photoshopped in real life, you ever seen a chick that looks like she wears a size perfect? Well I have, several times in one day. I was surrounded by a bunch of beautiful women that looked as If they just jumped out of a king magazine to be at this party. I know how to act around beautiful women, but this was hard. I wasn't prepared to see so many at one location, it was overwhelming. But it became easier than I expected.

From the moment I got there the air was just filled with positive energy. Joe Budden was one of the coolest guys I have ever met. I kept forgetting he was even a celebrity, just a cool down to earth dude and a great host. Everyone left their egos at the door, it was dimes there with fat bitch personalities. This baffled me. I never been around so many down to earth beautiful women. Everyone got along as well, it was so much love at this event. Nothing but positive energy, beautiful women, and a whole lot of liquor. It was something I have never seen in my life, it wasn't what I expected at all. I can't wait to Tell my unborn kids about this party, I'm going to over exaggerate the fuck out of it tho. My kids will think I was the man back in my day.

But, it was some problems at the party..

Nothing major, but something's that can ruin your life. Like you trying to spit game to a chick and a nba star comes an snatches her up. Yes, that was happening. Shawn Marion was pissing me slam off, I'm never watching a mavericks game again. You don't know how it feels to be talking to a beautiful woman and a nba player comes an just shuts down all your hopes and dreams. You had to bring out top of the line thirst to succeed at this party. I seen a chick talking to a dude and another dude make her stop and come with him. He did this without saying a word, he looked at her and gave a simple head nod and she swiftly left the other dudes thirst in the dust. I was amazed by this, I just sat in the corner and tweeted. At that moment I seen it was no possible way I was going to prosper. My life was ruined, I then knew my game wasn't about shit. My talk game is up there, but these were trained professionals. I couldn't compete, not to mention me falling down metal spiral steps earlier didn't help me none. Yes I'll admit it, I tumbled down some steps. Playas fuck up to. My life flashed before my eyes once I seen I lost my footing. I fall down steps all the time, but this was different. Joe was making an announcement so everyone was quiet and looking over toward the steps where I was at. Then, disaster struck. You have to understand these weren't regular steps, they were metal spiral steps. I was falling down the steps and turned a corner as I was falling. It was complete silence then all you hear is metal and flesh colliding with each other. Like a real nigga I played it off like it wasn't me, but I was the only one there on the steps :(. But hey shit happens.

But all in all, the greatest pool party I have ever been to! Thanks to all my followers that donated and made this happen for me. This party made my summer and I really appreciate y'all for making it happen. Thanks to joe budden for even inviting a regular dude like me. Hopefully I will get invited to more in the future, because I will never be able to enjoy regular parties ever again. But that's all I have, y'all be easy.

FOR MORE PICS CLICK HERE MORE POOL PARTY PICS

Commitment issues

Hello ladies and gentleman, let's talk about the number 1 relationship killer. Commitment issues. This is something I have a hard time understanding, but I get it for the most part.

Let's just get to it..

Majority of relationships fail because of commitment issues, and it's sad. If you have these issues cool, but you shouldn't get involved with anyone knowing this. I don't agree with commitment issues but it happens and it's nothing you can do about it. Commitment comes with maturity, an sadly maturity doesn't come with age. Maturity comes with experience, so it's understood that an inexperienced individual would have commitment issues. Which is why I feel NOBODY over the age of 21 should have commitment issues. Holding on to a grudge is very childish. Commitment issues are basically grudges you've held on with your past that you take out on your present and future.

Shit happens, accept it and get over it..

You're going to meet some fucked up people in life, that's just life. You have to accept it and keep it pushing. If you have it in your head that everyone is out to do you wrong, you're going to be right. It may not be the case, but you already convinced yourself different. Now you're not able to commit because you feel like everyone is out to hurt you like the ones in the past. Grow up. We're grown men and women, the thought that everything will go as planned should've been out your head a long time ago. Not everyone is out to hurt you, but you will continue to get hurt or hurt others when you have commitment issues. Once you develop commitment issues, it's damn near impossible to give someone your all. That's never a good thing. You're either going to end up finding something wrong or the person will feel unappreciated and leave. And that just starts this never ending cycle, it's like a domino affect. You break someone's heart now they have commitment issues and does the same to someone else. Eventually karma Catches back up with you when you finally get over your commitment issues. You drop your guard and you're able to commit and end up getting done dirty once again, that's how karma works.

But hey it happens.

Just don't waste anyone's time and make them feel like they don't do enough. Don't even attempt to get in a relationship until those commitment issues are worked out. There is no way you can work out commitment issues while in a relationship, trust me on this. Just stay single and work on yourself, it shouldn't be like this but some people aren't as strong minded as others. You should be able to get over your ex and go back at it when you find someone, with no past issues lying within you. If you can't then don't blame anyone else but yourself. Only weak minded individuals let their past effect their future. Don't be that person.

But that's all I have on that, y'all take care

Struggles of a Good Man

Hello ladies and gentleman, I would like to discuss something that is very weird to me. The struggles of a good man. Us good men might have it worse than the "ain't shit n*ggas". Of course every woman says she wants a good man, they also said the world was flat at one point in time. Truth of the matter is, they're lying. And I will explain

Us good men, we like to cater to our women and sometimes spoil them. We do whatever we have to do to make them happy, unless we have a problem with it. Women love that, but then they will have it in their head that you're a push over. No woman wants a man they can get over on all the time. That's when they start to lose respect for you and assume you're a punk. And that's not always the case at all. If you want something and I have no problem giving it to you, why wouldn't I? Some how doing too much positive for a female leads to them thinking negative.

You can't be too nice..

Most men were taught to be nice to women, but the ones that aren't have the most success with women. Women love assholes. I don't know why, they can't even tell you why themselves. Once you're too nice to a female, they start to become suspicious. That's when they start to feel like its too good to be true, which always leads to disaster. The relationship will slowly but surely come to an end because of this. Once they have that thought in their head that you're too nice, they will find something wrong. It may be nothing wrong at all, but they will find something.

But you can't communicate with them too much either...

You would think as a good man, communicating a lot with a female will help you prosper. Not at all my dude, not at all. Once you start being able to talk to her about anything an everything, you will find yourself closer to the friend zone. Women only want to be able to talk to their friends about any and everything, not their man. Is that logical? Hell no it's not logical, but that's just women for you.

That's the struggles us good guys have to go thru on a daily basis.

Don't get me wrong, it is a small amount of women that appreciate good men. Most of them are in their 30's, it's slim to none in their 20's. Once women reach their 30's they have already been there with the assholes, so they appreciate a good man. Younger women are still to young and immature to realize what's good for them. They know you would treat them right, but they will much rather have the thug with felonies and baby momma's. That's life, just accept it.

Maybe one day you will find a chick that appreciates you for being a good man. Until then, adapt to the women you deal with. Don't give them everything they want, don't be too nice, and don't you dare try to talk to them about everything. Don't do too much, do just enough to keep her around. Once you give your all, you can't get it back. Save your all for someone that deserves and appreciates it. You don't want to be that guy that gives your all and gets heart broken. You'll just feel stupid and be mad bitter. You'll be On twitter Tweeting shit like "fuck bitches get money" and other cliche ignorant statements.

I'm not saying don't be a good man, just saying don't be a good man to everyone. Establish who deserves to see that part of you and who doesn't. Do that and you should have no problems. Stay single, it's plenty of women you can have a relationship with and not give a title to. Save the title for that one you're going to give your all to.

But hey who am I, y'all gon do what y'all want regardless. Just hope some will understand where I am coming from. But that's all. Y'all be easy.

Act like a +1

What's up y'all this zoo, but you can call me the invited god. Don't be mad, I tweeted my thumbs off for this opportunity. But this isn't about me, this is about the +1 ass people that will be at the party. Before i go on, I want to make sure y'all know I will not be bringing a +1. I tweeted hard for this, you don't deserve to be in this epic event because of all my hard work. Bitch you wasn't with me tweeting in the crib.

Now let's begin...

Fellas, don't come to this event thinking you hot shit. Sit ya +1 ass down somewhere and be grateful you even got the opportunity. You a +1 ass nigga therefor act like a +1 ass nigga. I'm sure you don't know how and that's the point of this blog, so here's a few rules to help you prosper.

Rule #1
Don't be a fuckin groupie!
I understand your favorite video vixen will be in attendance, but close ya mouth and act like you're use to shit. Do remember you're only a +1, nobody wants to take pic's with you for ya lousy ass instagram page. Speak to joe, it's his house and his party so you're suppose to. But don't you dare go up to him spitting your lil struggle bars to him.

Rule #2
Don't over eat!
This is a pool party not golden coral my nigga, know your limit. Don't go overboard going for seconds and thirds. You're a plus 1, all you deserve is one plate. Make the best of it.

Rule #3
Have some respect!
This is a rule you should already know and use for day to day life. Be respectful, nobody likes a disrespectful ass unknown guest. Clean up after yourself, throw your trash in the trash. And if you're gonna stare at some asses, at least be sneaky with it.

Rule #4
Control your thirst!
It's going to be a lot of beautiful women there, and if you're not a faggot your going to try your luck. Just don't be creepy, don't go showing yaris the comments you left her on instagram. Don't tell a chick she looks so good you'd drink her bath water. That's thirsty, not to mention very disgusting. Just be cool, approach them like you would approach any other chick.

And lastly..

Rule #5
Stay in your place!
This rule is major, some people get comfortable and start to act like they own the place. Well, you don't so act like it. You see joe an friends having a convo, don't go jumping in it like you're somebody. Don't feed his dogs, those are not your pets weirdo. And as a plus 1, don't think for a second you can have a plus 1. You're barely invited my dude, you can't invite anyone. Oh and don't help yourself to anything, this isn't your auntie tink cookout. Just stay in your place and enjoy the festivities.

Follow these rules and I'm sure you will enjoy yourself, without disrespecting anyone. I'm sure half of you peons aren't invited, but you can use these rules for any pool party. I'm nobody to make any rules, this is just my opinion on how you should act. But that's my time, I have to finish planning for this party. Take care

The Friend Zone

Hello ladies and gentleman, I think all men will understand this blog. For women not so much, they rarely go thru this. And if you're a female that gets placed in the friend zone, you're probably very unappealing. We only put women in the friend zone when we wouldn't fuck them, that's the only reason. Well that and when you have a man, even then we're just patiently waiting for the break up. But Don't you dare, for a split second think you're there for your amazing personality.

But let's get down to it...

Now the friend zone is a deadly place, dont get stuck in there it's almost impossible to get out. The friend zone is so disrespectful, it makes you not even want to be a friend. No man in this world wants to display thirst for you then get put in the friend zone to hear you talk about other dudes. Bitch you got me fucked up. Most y'all have jobs so let me put it in a way y'all will understand.

It's like your the boss of the company and you're looking for a new supervisor. You have employees that are perfect for the position that you can promote, but rather not hire within. So now you go hire some Radom guy off the streets that you know nothing about and probably lied on his resume.
And now that he is hired, you get one of your hard working employees that you refused to promote train him. Now when that supervisor fucks up you go complaining about him to the employee that trained him seeking advice. You want to fire him but you don't feel like going thru the hiring process again. The employee is telling you, you need to get rid of him, but you don't listen. Now the employee is aggravated and bitter because he really wants that position.


Well bitch, that's exactly how we feel. But we don't get paid for this, we will quit on that ass. No two week notice or nothing, stealing mad supplies before we leave to. You don't realize you made a mistake until your assistant and that old employee starts hanging out.

Stop this shit, it's corny. The most important word in boyfriend/girlfriend is FRIEND. Friendship is a big part of any relationship, so why would you overlook the person thats already half way there? It's not logical at all when you think about it. Maybe your reason is because the friend is ugly, but looks aren't everything. You don't agree? Ok well If you're single now, then clearly dating off of good looks doesn't work out for you. Sometimes going out of your comfort zone will lead to you being more comfortable.

But you're grown, do what you want. Just don't realize you made a mistake when the person you put in the friend zone finds someone. Y'all take care.

Your box isn't special, give it up

Hello ladies and gentleman, fuck Steve Harvey. I felt like that needed to be said. He has ruined everything, him and Lyfe Jennings got me fucked up. They have women not doing what they want with their cock blocking logic. Now I am here to fix what they have fucked up.

Hey boo's

You wanna fuck someone then fuck em, first date, first minute, doesn't matter. You're grown, therefore you should do as you please. Don't let all those box juices go to waste because of what some bald game show host wrote in a book. Go head and hold out 90 days, we won't. We may stick around but bets believe somebody else is floating that box over to us. Holding out will only assure one thing, you will get played. See, when you hold out a guy will have high expectations on the box. Once the pussy is on a pedestal, you can go ahead an cancel Christmas.
Most guys will lie but ima tell you the truth, it's absolutely nothing special about your vagina ma'am. You're holding out like your box glows in the dark and shoots out glitter when you cum. Your box drips strawberry glaze? Didn't think so, so save that shit. Your Vagina doesn't do any special tricks, so don't treat it like it does.

I don't even understand the logic behind holding out. Do you think this will make a man respect you more? I hope not because that's just ridiculous. You can't make a man do anything, you can suggest that he does it an just hope for the best. Marilyn Monroe didn't pop that pussy all thru the white hoes for y'all to be holding out. This isn't what god wanted, he died for our sins so if you don't sin he died for nothing. You think eve held out the box to Adam? Fuck no. He gave her an apple and she was poppin that pussy all thru that garden. But you wasn't even in the bible and you wanna make me wait? Yea, you got me fucked up. We're men, we have needs. You want companionship with no sex, get a fuckin pet.

Give it up, if a man is gonna wife you he will. You making him wait isn't Going to make him want to. You make him wait and he finds out the box is horrible, he's going to leave anyways. Now you just wasted time an you're heart broken b/c you had feelings. And that's what the fuck you get, you deserve that shit. Sex is major in a relationship, you don't wanna find out the sex is bad when you're already in love nshit. Sooo get it out the way early.

But that's all I have, hopefully this will make y'all give me the box quicker.... I mean come to y'all senses. Take care.

Her Body Count

Hello ladies and gentlemen, I may ruffle a few feathers with this one. But I really don't care and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

You gotta get that body count...

I know you have been taught as a man you shouldn't ask a chick her body count. I also know 1 out of everything 3 men has wifed a hoe. You wife this hoe and got cheated on, now you a bitter dude tweeting shit like "fuck bitches get money". All of this could've been avoided if you would've just asked her body count. If she's not a hoe she will have no problem with telling you the truth. Your girl is your investment, you need to make sure you made the right investment before you get hurt. She may appear to be the sweetest girl, but that doesn't mean she wasn't poppin that pussy for answers to her psychology homework in college. You go in the club an think dudes hating on what you have, but that's not the case. The whole club know she was giving that neck up for a 5 dollar footlong except you. They laughing at you, and you just grinning thinking they want what you have. You never wondered why her cousin Mikey is so close to her but is never at any family functions. Mikey been knee deep in that box, and be tonguing her down every time you go to the bathroom. You will never know how epic her hoe phase was unless you ask. Women don't give up that info voluntarily, take some initiative.

One thing you have to know before you ask, she will lie to you. She doesn't want to be judged and feels like its none of your business, so don't expect the truth. Just take the number she gave you, divide it by her age and times that number by 4. So if she's 24 and says her body count is 6 use this formula.

24/6=4 x 4=16

And now you have her body count! Find out when she started having sex to find how much she was a hoeing. Lets say she started at 16.

24-16=8/16= 2

So in her 8 years of having sex, she average 2 body's a year. You have yourself a keeper! Ignore the fact that she was in a relationship for 5 of them, that will lead to disaster. Just be satisfied that it's only 12 dudes that can say they fucked your girl. If you know 3 of them get the fuck out of there. I know it was the past but us men have a lot of pride. It fucks with us mentally having to dap up dudes an they have "I fucked ya bitch" written all over their face. You introducing her to dude like "this John" and get the deadly "we've already met" response. At that moment you start wondering the wrong things like, did he teach her that trick she does with her tongue? This is what you don't want to do. This is why you avoid asking her any of their names, unless you have a really good reason. Other than that, don't think about it bro.

Get her body count before you introduce to her mom dukes, seriously. You don't want your mom to be accepting a hoe an keeping contact with her after she cheats on you. Shit can ruin all your future relationships.

But hey what do I know, you don't have to listen to me. But while you call yourself keeping it real by not asking her, I'll be the old fling that keeps in contact. Peace

Confidence

Hello ladies and gentlemen, I want to talk about something very important. And that's confidence.

People with no confidence act like confidence isn't everything!

Confidence is something you need for everyday life. Anything you can possible think of doing requires confidence. When you go on a job interview, you can have absolutely no experience what so ever and could get the job strictly because of your confidence. People flock to people who are sure of themselves. You have to be confident in yourself if you want people to be confident in you. When someone ask you to do something never say you're going to try. Trying leaves room for failure, it also screams You're not confident in yourself. Of course you may still fail, but that's life. You can't succeed at everything, but you should still be confident enough to believe you can succeed at everything.

But don't be too confident, yes that's possible

It's not that bad to be too confident, but it will come off as arrogance. I was a firm believer on you shouldn't care what people think of you, but I'm getting over that. If you don't want to be hated and lonely, you should slightly care of what people think. And being overly confident will make people feel like you think they're inferior. Nobody wants to feel like that, and it will push them away. When you're overly confident, you also start to believe you're never wrong. When you think you're never wrong, nobody can tell you anything. That will make people not want to deal with you. Nobody likes an irrational know it all, Trust me i know.

Be confident, but balance it. Not too much confidence, but not too little. Just enough for people to take notice. That's all for now, take care.

Relationships

Hello ladies and gentlemen, let's talk about relationships. I know a lot of y'all are single an loving it, but let's be real. Everyone wants a dope relationship, being single gets old after a while.

But hey if you want to be single forever then just stop reading now.

Relationships are one the Dopest things ever! Not all, but If you don't have a dope one then you shouldn't be in it. Relationships are about commitments, If you say otherwise you need to grow up. We're grown now, this isn't high school where we get into relationships for selfish reasons. In high school we had bf/gf's because we liked someone and didn't want anyone else to have them. That's not the case now that we're adults, atleast it shouldn't be. Now you should be getting into relationships with people because they make you feel good. We're to old to be getting into relationships that we're not going to take serious. Don't waste people's times with your immaturity. Only get into a relationship if you can vision yourself with that person for a long time. Your partner should be your lover and your best friend, a person you think about all times of the day. This person should accept your flaws, and wants to help you better yourself. When you find someone like that you're suppose to keep them around. You don't find people like that often, that's why you capitalize when you do. Don't miss out on your soulmate because you feel you're not ready. When a perfect Job calls will you tell them you're not ready? Hell no, you will make yourself ready you should do the same in this case. You don't want to be old and lonely with 10 cats regretting your old decisions. I mean yea being single is cool, you can have sex with whoever you want an not answer to anyone. But why wouldn't you just want one person you can talk to about anything and have sex with? Maybe it's just me tho.

I could be wrong tho, I'll rather have one person that loves me for me. I rather be more than that guy she's just sleeping with. I'm gonna give my all to every chick that deserves it. If you can't give your all don't bother wasting someone's time with a relationship.

But do what you do, I will be the guy laughing at you when you're old an single because you ran all the good ones away. Take care

Breakups

Hello ladies and gentlemen, as most may know my girlfriend who has no stomach broke up with me. This blog isn't about her tho, just breakups in general. Just wanted to put that out there so y'all will believe me more knowing im going thru this.

Now on to this shit....

Heartbreak is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Heartbreak can break the strongest individual down. It's like you can actually feel your heart breaking into a thousand pieces in your chest. But it's life, you will have to deal with it one way or another.

Not everything is worth breaking up over...

Nobody in this world is perfect, so don't expect perfection from anyone. Everyone has flaws, the perfect person for you is someone with flaws that you can deal with. Physical flaws may be the hardest to deal with, but mental flaws are the easiest to work thru. With physical flaws it's not much to worry about. They're right there, and If it bothers them you won't even get the opportunity to fall in love. Things like trust issues an insecurities are things you may not become aware of until later. But if you're in love, you wouldn't let those small things end your relationship. Talk it out with your partner before you do something drastic. If someone does everything right but doesn't trust you, that's something you can work on. Trust issues and insecurities can be fixed, not saying it will be easy to most. All couples have disagreements, it's nothing wrong with a healthy argument. You just have to make sure the problem is taken care of after that argument. Holding things in is the worse thing you can do in this situation. You will hold it in to the point where you resent that person, now something so small has become major in your head. One of the other things you shouldn't do is talk about the problem with your friends before you talk to your significant other. That will always lead to disaster. Your friends opinion will always be bias no matter what. I'm not saying you should try to work everything out because some thing's just cannot be fixed. On the other hand, you cant assume that everything can't be fixed. Once you talked about it several times and nothing has come of it, then that is the proper time to end it. If you don't care enough to talk it out then you should end it there. Well honestly, if you didn't care you shouldn't of been in the relationship in the first place. Some may care but still want to end it before trying to work it out. That's b/c they have been in that situation before and they see where it is going. Which lets you know that the person has other issues that are embedded in them from past relationships. You should never let your past affect your future, EVER.

But it happens, don't beat yourself up over it.

Analyze the breakup and try to figure out what went wrong so you can fix it. It's easier to move on when you realize it wasn't you that messed up. You don't want to go around blaming yourself, it will depress you. But if it was you be mature enough to admit you were wrong. You love that person, don't let your pride mess up reconciliation. It may not be over for good, it may be something y'all really needed. Just keep your head up and do everything you can to make it right. If that's doesn't work you can at least say you tried. That will make the moving on process easier.

One more thing. If you feel like everyone else did wrong but all of your past ex's are happily married and engaged... Guess what, it's YOU!

But hey what do I know, my gf had no stomach and now has no good boyfriend. Take care

Flirting in a Relationship

Hello ladies and gentlemen, this is for those in a relationship. Now before I start, I want to point out that double standards will always be around. Some will say there is no such thing, just standards for women and standards for men. I slightly agree with that. It's actions women can get away with that A man could never pull off. And vice versa. Flirting is one of them.

Men are natural flirts, that's just us...

It's almost impossible to find a man that doesn't flirt, it's just something women need to accept. Flirting doesn't mean we would take it to another level with the person we are flirting with. Sometimes we just want to see if we still have it, I couldn't tell you why that's just how it is. We get satisfaction just knowing we could have sex with someone else, some act on it. But some can control the urge an just be satisfied with knowing we can. It's in our nature to be attracted and want to have sex with multiple women, flirting helps compress that characteristic in us. Sometimes we hide it from our significant other simply to avoid the drama that may come with. And that's when we appear to look sneaky. That's why it's important for you ladies to set boundaries with your man. Let him know you don't mind the flirting, but make him aware what you won't allow. Communication is key to a healthy relationship. Sometimes you have to just let a man be a man, but it's important you express how you feel about it. Communicate and find middle ground, He will respect you for it. If he takes advantage of your trust and cheats, that's just something you just have to deal with. You can't stop the inevitable, just do your part. You know you did everything you were suppose to, which should help you get thru the pain of getting cheated on.

But let it be known, women are more likely to cheat...

Women flirt too, yes we are aware of this, But it's more of a big deal when women flirt. Men can't have sex with every woman they flirt with, women can for the most part. An attractive woman can have sex with almost every man they flirt with, that's the problem. Which is why men are not comfortable with their girl flirting. Men can flirt with a woman but If the woman doesn't want sex it will never happen. As a man we know how other men think, so we know that guy you're flirting with will try his hand if given the opportunity. And the fact that you're flirting let's us know that you're attracted to him in some type of way. I'm not saying women can't flirt, just saying be prepared for your man to say something about it. As a men we have pride, as a woman you should understand this. And also do whatever you can to not make us feel less as men.

There you have it..

Men can flirt women cannot, embrace the double standard. Hopefully you guys now understand why it is how it is... If not I'll do a part two and go more in depth. Either way, my girl knows I don't like her flirting. She has no stomach, can't have her giving guys false hope. Be easy.

Men lie, Women lie. Paternity Test don't

Hello ladies and gentleman, I need your undivided attention for a brief moment. I was in 7 eleven the other day an seen a dark skin man with a light skinned baby. I know that doesn't sound unordinary in the slightest bit, but when the pops look like dmx and child looks like Chico debarge you start to wonder. This guy is clearly walking around being a father to his step kid, that's not his baby. Hopefully he reads my blog an comes to his senses. That slightly had nothing to do with this, but whatever.

Now lets turn up (I always wanted to say that)...

Now fellas, I know we don't use condoms because we all know they're for dirty men and homosexuals. But we still have to protect ourselves in other ways. It's a lot of men walking around owing child support on a child that was born by a woman that was supposedly on birth control. Women love raw sex just as much as us, do not let them fool you. But instead of them just admitting they don't want to use a condom, they make up these unbelievable tall tales. And we're so horny and gullible we believe the bullshit they tell us. You be wobble dancing all in that drenched box and don't notice till you cum that she's a nurse. That's when you come to your senses an realize she wears latex gloves to work everyday. But 2 hours prior you believed when she told you she was allergic to latex. Now you've been bamboozled, and you didn't pull out so guess what. 9 months later, SIMILAAAAC! Now what are you going to do, step up and take of your seed right? As you should. But now you have another dilemma. You go thru ten combs a week trying to comb your nigga naps but your child has curly hair and blue eyes? Something doesn't add up, but cool women lie.. But paternity test don't, cop that test.

But hey ladies, we lie to...

Now ladies you know when have Niagara falls as a box in your panties. You know what you have down there, so don't play stupid. Now your going to have guys doing the most deceitful shit to not use a condom. He been texting you all day, filling your inbox up with consistent thirst. But he gets there and tell you he doesn't have a condom. But you're use to that so you pull out your own, at this moment you can see the discouragement on his face. But little do you know you just helped his lie get even better. We're pros at this, that condom will come off an you won't know until that period is late. Now you're worried b/c it's suppose to be that time of the month and your box isn't suwoopin. Now you prepare yourself to send that deadly text that all men dread. You know what I'm talking about, that 'i think I'm late' text. Now be prepared to get cursed the fuck out, and be called all types of dirty bitches. He's going to tell you he used a condom and you know he did b/c you gave it to him. Now you're confused, and just crying with your pregnant ass watching lifetime eating ice cream and pickles. But don't stress it, men lie. But guess what, paternity test don't. Get that test

There you have it, men lie women lie.. Paternity test don't. But don't be ignorant and call Maury, you both will look stupid. You don't want to hear "you're not the father" on national tv. Now you just crying. Talking about you were 1000% sure and he's smiling from ear to ear on stage doing his best dougie.

Be classy about it, nobody has to know about it. It take two to make a baby, so it should only be two involved getting a paternity test.

But hey y'all grown, do what you want. I'm just a guy who knows his girl isn't pregnant because she still has no stomach. Be easy

Love Yourself

Hello good people, i decided to actually write something positive. I am far from a negative person, just misunderstood. So I figured I'd attempt to show the positive side to me.

That was corny, but yea...let's begin...

Who are you living for? That should be a question that takes no thought to be answered. You're living for yourself and you will die by yourself, never forget that. In between time you have to love yourself or you will never fully enjoy life. Once you learn to love yourself, nothing anyone says about you will harm you. We're all human we all have flaws and we all bleed the same(some bleed monthly tho). No matter what anyone says, you should never feel inferior to anyone point blank. You have something you don't like about yourself change it or learn to love it. You have one life to live and you shouldn't live it being down b/c of what someone else thinks of you. Confidence is everything, be confident, love yourself, and you will prosper every time.

That's all I have right now, so ima be on my way an continue to love myself.. And of course my gf who has no stomach. Take care

Fat B*tch, Regular Person Head

Hello good people, Im going to take this time to warn you about the husky heffa's destroying our community. Before I begin, I have no problem with fat people. I am a recovering fat person myself. I only have a problem with you guys not acting your weight, if you're offended stop reading an do some sit ups.

Now, let's get started...

When we browse social networking sites we see a lot of beautiful women an never think to ourselves why are none of them fat? An that's the problem, most of them are fat but they're deceiving the nation right in front of our eyes. The fat bitches with the regular person head do exist, and are taking over social networks at an alarming rate. These hefty creeps need to be stopped before someone gets hurt. To stop them you have to properly know how to identify them, an that's what I am here for.


Identify and destroy!

Identifying the enemy at hand isn't the easiest thing to do. These fat fucks have mastered the art of deception, photoshop, and angling of pictures. But with proper training you can catch it before it's too late.

Let's start off with the easiest, Angling..

A fat bitch with a regular person head is one of the worlds greatest photographers. It comes with the weight, once you reach a certain weight your photography skills become impeccable. To the untrained eye, you will think you're just looking at a regular sized chick who is just showing off her facial features. Nope. That's not the case, head shots are a fat bitches forte. She may be shaped like a MacBook but still has the face of a size 5 chick. And you bets believe she will use it to her advantage. Her neck looks like a hot dog factory so she will make sure it is not in the picture. You have to make sure you analyze the picture to the fullest. 98.9% of all fat bitches have high cheek bones, that's a clear sign for you to get the fuck on. Then you start to notice her display picture been the same for a year, now your eyes are open an you see the obvious signs. Don't ignore the signs! You don't want to be that guy to meet a chick off the Internet and be surprised that she's built like a bag of dirty laundry. Don't be that guy.

That's all for now...

Don't ignore the signs, I didn't that's why my girl has no stomach. Good day

Never Trust a Person Living With Their Ex

Hello ladies and gents, well mostly ladies the men are angry with me. Apparently I'm single handily "fuckin up the game" with the direction of my blog. Well maybe y'all game is fuckin up my blog, I don't want to write about this shit. But hey, it is what it is till lyfe Jennings get out of prison and link up with Steve Harvey.

But let's get on subject...

Man or woman, you should not trust anyone shacking up with their ex. Point blank period no ifs ands or buts about it. We're all grown here an we all have our needs, and If those needs are in your humble abode best believe you're going to utilize them. You got me fucked up if you think I'll live with my ex and not have her poppin that pussy for ya boy. Shitting me, that's a mans dream to have In house pussy and still have the right to do as they please. Of course their are a few out there that can live with their ex without a single sexual rendezvous. That doesn't mean you should trust them, in this situation there should be absolutely no trust what so ever! We're talking about them living with an individual that they were once sexually attracted to. This isn't just some random roommate found on Craigslist, this isn't just some old friend. This is someone they use to have aggressive, steamy, sweaty, funky, bed breaking, neighbor waking hot sex with on a daily basis. You can't compete with that, an it's no reason in this world that would make you want to try. Yea you could have deep feelings for this person and give them a pass, but it shouldn't even get to that point where you can catch feelings. You have to dead it before it even starts, you get that info in the first few days then dispose of those digits with lightning speed. Now if its casual and you just want to be a hoe, then disregard everything said in this here blog. This is only if you're trying to build something legit, living conditions are expendable when looking for a fling. Now let's be serious here, would you trust a recovering crack addict living in a crack house? Hell no, it's hard to be in the presence of something you use to love and not relapse. Damn near impossible. Now you looking stupid cus he/she want that old thing back. And all you can do is cry alligator tears, eat a tub of ice cream, and listen to Adele and her son drake on repeat. Take my word for it, you don't want to listen to adele and understand everything she is going thru in her songs. Be smart about it, if the person cares enough they will change their domicile for you.

If not, eh it's other fish in the sea. Go get you some bait.

Just don't get involved with someone living with their ex, no matter how much they try to convince you it's nothing. Don't fall for it, unless you know you're ugly and can't find anyone else. I mean if you look like maya Angelou in the face don't listen to me, take what you can get. Other than that, don't settle.

But hey don't listen to me, I'm just a regular guy whose girlfriend has no stomach. Be easy y'all

Check Her/His Phone!

Hello good people, how are you doing today? Don't answer that, I need you guys to concentrate and stay focused on the subject at hand. Before I start I would like to notify you ladies that if you're in a relationship with a single man this blog isn't for you. I do not want you side chicks thinking y'all have rights on the account of my blog, not gonna happen.

Now let's get down to the get down...

Check your significant others mobile device almost every chance you get. I mean thoroughly checked, every crease, every inch and every nook and cranny of that phone. I know you're thinking "wouldn't that make me insecure?" well, yes it will. But so what everyone has insecurities, it's all on how you embrace them. Sometimes being secure is just being overly confident and can lead to disaster. For example, let's say you're looking to purchase a house. Before you purchase this house are you going to be secure enough to not get the property looked at before you invest? Of course not, so why would you do so with your significant other? If I am with you, you're my investment an I have to protect my investment by all means. Yes investment, i invested time money and effort bitch you is mine. So I'm going to check your phone and make sure everything is the way it's suppose to be. And if you have nothing to hide it should mean absolutely nothing to you.

But, there are a few things you need to know beforehand...

Now be aware, when you go thru the phone you may see some things you don't like and things you may not want to know. How you react will be detrimental to your relationship. If its nothing major, do not bring it up. I cannot be more serious when I say DO NOT BRING IT UP! This Is where most fuck up at and get looked at differently. You don't want to ask her who is J and find out its her girl cousin. That's when you get hit with the deadly question "why were you going thru my phone anyway?". It's no comeback to that, just apologize and keep it moving. After several times checking and you find nothing, I'll advise you to stop. Don't make it a habit. If you constantly do it, you just have trust issues that you need to get rid of.

I know I know, you're probably thinkin "if you're checking the phone don't you have trust issues?". No, let me explain why....

You don't just establish trust all willy nilly, trust has to be earned. Your not gonna get in your car an trust you can make it somewhere without checking your gas are you? No you're not, but once you figure out how your car runs you will. We all drove with the gas light on an know in our head we have 10 miles till that bitch breaks down. It's pretty much the same thing, once you check the phone a few times an see how your significant other operates trust is gained.. Or sometimes not.

An there you have it.

Embrace your insecurities until you're able to eradicate them. This isn't something you should boast and brag about tho. It may be frowned upon by others which will bring judgement that may make you insecure about your insecurity. Then you will be all fucked up.

But fuck their opinions, have control of your relationship. If you wanna know then find out, if there is something hidden their damn sure not going to tell you.

But hey don't listen to me, you can be the secure idiot getting told they're getting cheated on an respond "I know my baby she/he wouldn't do that". Then find out the maintenance man be having ya girl poppin that pussy in the storage room while you at work trying to make a decent living. Avoid that, check that phone.

Either way makes me no difference, my relationship is great an my girl has no stomach. But y'all take care